last night called mum, heard surprising news:

my 17-year-old cousin, who was always top 10 student of his high school (very famous local school in my hometown) and was always his family's proud, had decided to abandon his study.

Mum told me his Dad scolded at him for an unideal result months ago, and seems he was badly hurt, now he refuses to go to school, neither to talk about studies. People worried about him, but seems he enjoys his current lifestyle a lot.

HERE,
I wanna say, Kunkun (the boy's nick), you're such a BRAVE kid! you are doing something I've been dreaming but never had the courage to do!

I saw him growing up. and I knew how hard he tried to get everyone satisfied. he was just too tired of the pressure given by family and school, and finally rebelled.



What's the benefit of being GOOD?

I was (or shall i say I was forced to be?) a good student before I was 24. After I had got my master's drgree, I became (or shall i say i foced myself to be?) an obedient employee: Seniority should always be respected, always keep a smile on my face, never say "NO" to old rules, take responsibility.

well, when you're doing something excellent, people will not pay too much attention on that,ur effort will not always be recognized, (even you contributes a lot, many un-related person will come to share the result and call it "team work performs best" $%^#^#), but when you're making mistaks~~ huh~~ they have finally get a chance to blah blah blah, ur mistake entertains them, and when everyone wants to shift the responsibility, it's great to have a dumb to take it over!

pretending, pretending, I'm not nice, I'm just pretending to be nice. I'm not pretty-looking, without makeup I look like any passenger on the road.

I am a pretender, "pretending to be good" is not only my mask but already melted in my blood.

Sometimes I look at myself and started to hate the girl I am being. why do i need to act nice to everyone? why I can not fight back when people are pouring dirty water on me? why I always say ok when some workmates asking me to do things I don't like to? why i kept writing this on my blog but not throwing stones on those widow faced people? I SUX, no medicine to cure, and I think I will this life forever... I feel ashamed on this.

being good? what a big joke!

many times, I said YES but my mind says NO... that's the cause of my unhappiness




Kunkun,
I admire you for doing things I could never do.
however, being your "elder sister" ... I can not show that I support you...
but I wish you live a happy life, no matter what you choose to.
hey, smart as you, why not spend little time to finish the study, it's really pity if you just choose to give it up.